October 22, 2012

Online Dating Deconstructed: It's Just A Numbers Game

Back in 2009, I was single and ready to mingle. I was 26 years old and had been single for just over a year. This single year had definitely been the best year of my twenties. I had landed a contract job teaching math (which was a great pick up line at bars), I had just bought my first car, had laser eye surgery, I paid off my OSAP by living with my parents, then had a magical three months living in my Aunt and Uncle's house while they were in Florida. I watched every season of Nip Tuck during this time, and hosted some amazing girls nights.  Life was good, but I was ready to venture back into the awkward world of dating. 

The only problem was I didn't know where to meet any men!! My social circle was mainly limited to other single girls searching for love, and the only single man I even encountered at work was my older brother. My options were limited. I took my good friend Rochelle's advice and went online. I signed up for a profile on Plenty of Fish and I saw a profile of a guy my brother had previously tried to set me up with. I contacted him and we set a time for a first date. I liked him so we dated for over a year, had an exhausting break-up, and a year and a bit later I was right back where I started. 

The second time around I knew a little bit more about the online world and how to navigate. I made a profile on eHarmony, then went to Europe for three weeks. (Side Note: This is not helpful when trying to online date. You should be in the city you want to date in). Upon my return, I met the first guy I started to email then we started dating. He was funny, and we had a couple months together, then you guessed it: OVER!

The third time I around, I did some research and made an account on eHarmony and Lavalife. Going off some amazing advice I went along with the motto, "It's just a number's game". I knew I had to get out there, meet as many guys I could, and not put any pressure on any one guy to become my eventual husband. I had to stop dating the first guy I met just because he looked good on paper. 

After going on more first dates than I care to list (okay, it's only about 6 guys but this was during the month of January and going out in -30C weather while trying to still look presentable seemed like a lifetime), I met my darling boyfriend Erik. I knew I liked him immediately,  and wanted to see him again as soon as possible. We didn't play any games, and were soon, and still are, madly in love. 

Together we compiled some do's and don't of online dating. He had been in and out of the online world since 2008, and together we felt like we had seen it all. I will post a series of Online Dating Deconstructed posts, based on our joint experiences. First up...which site is best?


  1. Update: ok, well, it’s been a month, and guess what? The date went well and that we are literally dating! we tend to had lots to speak about; her last relationship, my incapacity to not have a girlfriend, ha ha, we had chinagirls.dating

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